Clé de Lune

errr as the title says~

i have moved to another site~~ please do visit!! it's

http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=cle_delune

thanks guys~~ <3333

finally~

as you guys know i am trying to shift to another course but to no avail this summer is practically hell! i've been going in and out of my university for 2 weeks now begging them to let me take the shifter's exam, and still there's no progress. i am thinking that all my effort's are futile, i just have to face the truth. i dont have a chance anymore. and you know what the most embarrassing thing was... i even cried infront of all the staff in that college when they told me that i didnt make it in the cut-off. i promised myself that i am not going to cry if anything bad happens but at that moment i couldnt help myself, i just felt my tears flowing down. they gave me another chance if i write to the dean and explain my side maybe, just maybe i'll make it. damn it... i feel so hopeless and frack helpless. i hate this feeling, i hate this, i hate this.

oh and to add up, did i  mention that i felt so alone during the whole expirience? No. this is not one of Cle's drama this is for real. dont you just hate it when people tell you that they love you and is concerned about you? just last month i've been getting tons of them and now where are those people? (putcha kung alam nyo lang kung anong pinagdadaanan ko ngayon!) i mean why is it always like this, when i say those words i mean it, i do it, i do make the person feel that i give a damn about him/her when ever he or she needs someone. but now again where are these people?!!!! maybe i should stop being like that what do you think? i've had enough. (nasasaktan na kasi ako eh.)

to who ever's reading this entry thank you. i do hope you understand.

yup. as the title says~ i am gonna be away from the net, not to metion the busy city and traffic for a while. *phew* anyway i still have a few more hours to kill before we go so i decided to type something here~ rather to post something.. O_o

as usual my current fav. buffy. (god i cant believe i DL-ed some fan tributes for buffy and spike >_< pics once again anyone? just click on the link~ sumthin is wrong with my posts recently i cant get it right... ~

"http://img213.exs.cx/img213/3906/buffyspike0028kl.th.jpg"

"http://img78.exs.cx/img78/5171/5spike0302lw.th.jpg"

"http://img78.exs.cx/img78/5497/100epcouples9ln.th.jpg"

"http://img78.exs.cx/img78/7778/buffyspike0050wg.th.jpg"

credits: chosentwo.com

hmm.... now what to do... i still have *glances at clock* 1 and a half hour to waste~

what to do... what to do????? O_O

oh well i'll see you all in my next entry~! :D

i watched Angel last night~ well only the Buffy part and i was like this  after i watched Spike and Buffy...

Buffy: I love you

Spike: no you dont, but thanks for saying it.

he died after that~ awww he really loves her *sniff* T______T it breaks my heart!! And Anya died!! (i dont know if i am gonna be happy or what but she died)

here some pics since i am really generous nowadays~ gawd i love this pairing oh so much~!! asdfghjkl buffy naman ang tanga mo naman mahal ka naman nya eh!!! >__<

grabe na ito ang gwapo nya~~ i cant believe that he's already err.. what 40 na daw but who cares he looks so damn hot!! :wub:

AAHHHHHH~~~~!!! *dies*

credits to www.chosentwo.com for the pics

there i am done~ i am gonna look where i can DL some series~!!

oo... *cle poking self* tama ba to? summer na!! pero teka bakit parang hindi ko mafeel? O_o kakaiba... hmm.. anyway wala talaga kong magawa this summer. haaayyyy wish ko lang hindi mamatay ang braincells ko dahil wala akong maisip na matinong gawin. nakikinita ko na, matatapos ko lahat ng books na binili ni mama sa kin. sige yun na lang magbabasa na lang ako ng magbabasa... O_O

or lets see now, i could always work for mom this summer... but. frack it's gonna be boring too. no social life, no fun, just pure labor. NO LIFE???!!! ahhhhh >__< i dont know!!! *cle banging head on the wall* maybe my friend's right, she told me last night that she wanted school back (opo pareho po kasi kaming walang magawa) oh but on second thought NO I DONT WANT TO GO BACK IN SCHOOL JUST YET i am not that stupid enough to go back to.... ok Cle calm down... there... there.. calm... shhhhh..... moving on.

let me just share what i've been doing for the pass few days of my summer. i am reading fics~ wait tha's not new O_o ummmm yeah, ummm i am collecting manga scans as of the moment and Sasusaku pics, yeah you're dearest Cle is once again in to this stuff bear with her

here some pics~

ahhhh ewan ko na lang but i am really in to this couple~ kinikilig ako!!

damn wala lang sigurong lovelife kaya ganito ako >__< waaaa~~

okies i'll leave it here for a while until i get something good to post  ehehehehhe~~~

shheeeesshh finally the finals are done~! grabe magkakapag pahinga na din!! for almost 2 weeks wala akong decent sleep yung pinaka matagal na time ko matulog was only  5 hours. and there was also this one time na 2 days akong hindi na katulog dahil sa mga projects >_< shemai ang sakit sa ulo T__T at grabe todo editting ang loka. haaayyy I just hope that i'll pass my courses. *corsses fingers and prays for devine intervention* i wanna pass math... T__T

last night debut party ni Tina. it was fun really and nagkaroon ako ng guys bestfriend bigla O_O oi Miko~~ *pokes* ang emosyonal ko nga when i gave my speech to Tina, letche naiyak pa ko well siya din naman eh whahahaha~ moving on, kasama ko din kahapon sila Alithea and si Tikki wahahaha kulang ang de Lune sisters sayang so yon 4 lang kami. sana na nga magkita kaming lahat nakakamiss na kasi eh. haayy.

sige end ko na to, naguupdate lang :D

T____T
i've got so many things to do ahuhuuuhu~!
wanna see how many they are?
here's a quick list
*planetarium (mind you it's so damn big i have no idea how am i going to bring that in school >__<)
*english research paper/ term paper
*theology project
*filipino journal
*tour101B (itinerary and written report)
....
......
........
and i am gonna submit them all next week.... T________T

and to top it all of... i saw this pic.. waaaaa this made me cry I WANNA MEET MY SHINHWA TOO... Lucky you Sandara Park lucky you...
*Cle goes and jumps off a clif*


anyway i better get back to my work~ i dont want them to pile up more T___T

sheesh i just got home from the convention and i still have to study for a very long quiz tom in theo >__<.

lets see now the convention.... it was cool, i like the presentation and the gadgets that they've presented *i want a wireless notebook~!* anyway i was in the middle of pasay and i was at the verge of panicking for my friends and i have NO IDEA on how the heck are we gonna get home O_o then out of god knows where, my bestfriend suddenly shows up~ i was like O_O what the...OMG WE'RE REALLY MEANT TO BE~~!!! TT____TT weeeeeeee~~ so errrrr that explains how i got home today (blah blah shut up Cle)

anyway... more blah blah~

i've been out of focus lately and with that i've been forgetting some of my responsibilities. *sigh* i am starting to fail on a certain subject. grrrr... i am thinking of dropping it but it's too late and the only option that i have is that i should get atleast 88 above to get to the uno standing or maybe a dos.... >__< grrrrrr..... Cle AJA~ kaya mo toh~~!! concentrate~~!! I CAN DO THIS~!!! OHHHH YYYYYEEEAAAAHHHHH~~!!!

oh and another thing...
eeeerrrrrr~~ i am starting to move on~!!weeeee~~
(sana nga)
*sigh*

Cle singing:
"i am moving on without you~~...."
*dances around*
*thunder clouds forming*

eerrrr... wooops~

it's been three months and i cant believe i kept it all. it was just recently that i actually admitted to someone what's been bugging me. and with that i would like to thank those people who listened and helped me get through this ordeal.

delru --> you automatically came in to mind when i felt that i needed to talk to someone to talk to about this matter. you're the first one who knew this and i am glad that you're the first person who ever knew. thanks. do know that i love you so much.

rachel --> it's been quite a while. i thought that i am over that stage but after this i guess not. i guess i am really in denial, thanks for making me realize that. i'll see you soon. i love you too.

ally --> i am so sorry if i only told you this yesterday. thanks for bitting me that helped a lot. i am so sorry for the phone call, i guess your dad would be after my neck. (lol) thanks it helped me feel better. i love you ok.

kai --> your drama queen came back to life. thanks for welcoming her back in.

i guess it would be unfair for you guys if i would spare you one last detail... so here...

i hurt my self last night... worry not i didnt cut my self or anything, the wall and i are errrr "friends" so ummm my hands ache like hell, i dont even know how i managed to type all this. my left arm's bruised. *ally thanks for the bite it added up ^^v* and yeah.. that's about it. but you know... afterwards.. i felt really pathetic. damn what forced me on to doing that >___<. i just wish that i could get over this immediately. i cant stand it.

now i am fearing that i would hate that person and i dont want that to happen.

*sigh*

oo...
alam kong hindi pwede.
pero sa katigasan ng ulo ko, nagpupumilit ako.
nasaktan ako.
pero tinuloy ko parin dahil umaasa ako na sana mag-bago ang isip mo at mapansin mo.
manhid ka nga lang talaga.
wala na... sayang lang.
tama na.
ayoko na masaktan pa kaya pipilitin ko ang sarili ko na kalimutan ka.
sana magawa ko.
pero bago ang lahat, bago kita tuluyan ng kalimutan sana malaman mo na minahal kita.

***********************************

ano ba ito ang drama ko naman >___< *cle poking self* eeeeekk~~!!!

pero sana nga talaga diba... ayoko na kasing masaktan. ang hirap kasing maranasan yung binabalewala ka... tama na nga siguro to. maybe hindi naman talaga kami dapat magkakanito, sayang naman kasi... at ayoko siyang mawala sa akin.

oo alam ko naguguluhan kayo sa mga sinasabi ko pero sana intindihin nyo na lang ako. nasasaktan ako at hindi ko alam yung pano ito takasan o pano ko ito gagawan ng paraan para matapos.